Tuesday, December 9, 2008


Seriously, is there anything more awkward than caroling? Both the giving and the receiving of the unwanted intrusion of people singing loudly on an unsuspecting doorstep is just too much for me. Tonight we had the sweetest showing of probably 40 people from our new neighborhood, standing on our porch singing to me and Andy. Calvin was over at his grandparent's, so we didn't even have him for a distraction. I remember when I was younger and carolers came, my mom would make us all gather at the door to listen. At least then our family was big enough that I could hide at the back and giggle uncomfortably with one of my siblings. Tonight it was just me and Andy, maintaining eye contact with a huge yard full of perfect strangers. I should just be grateful for their efforts to welcome us, but it was so awkward. Here's how it went down...

I see them coming up to the door, so I run into the kitchen to Andy and say, "someone's at the door. Go open it."
"Who is it?"
"Carolers I think"
"I'm not opening it, we'll just pretend we're not here"
"We can't. They saw me."
"Well then you open it"
"Okay, but you have to come with me."

By this point we can hear a bunch of people talking, and some kid kicking our door.

We open the door and are immediately bombarded with Joy to the World.

We do our best to maintain eye contact the entire time, scanning the crowd looking for anyone we knew, smiling painfully.

It seemed like it lasted FOR-E-VER, and when it blissfully came to an end, I could think of nothing better to do but start clapping. Dead Silence. A little boy handed me a loaf of bread and I said,

"Thank you very..."

They cut me off with a rousing rendition of We Wish You a Merry Christmas.

That song also lasted forever. When it was over, they didn't say a thing, just turned and walked away. I still don't know who any of them were.

It's just so awkward.